Sunday, February 27, 2011

Normalcy is Overrated

I am thinking about the nature of solitude and wondering if it is quite normal that I don't like to go out too much or talk on the phone at all but prefer to send people goodies in the mail or little random text notes for fun. I am not hypersocial, admittedly. Sometimes, people describe their social lives and I think that sounds exhausting.

I don't want anyone to call me at 10 p.m. and ask me if I want to go out because I probably don't. I want to wear my pajamas and watch movies by myself and maybe scatter some poems out on the floor and put them in some sort of meaningful order. I want to bake elaborate cakes while listening to Nirvana or Bob Marley or maybe Simon & Garfunkel because it reminds me of my childhood. I want to fold towels and putter about the house and rearrange my bookshelves. I don't want to gossip or hang out in bars except perhaps once in while especially if there will be poetry or dancing.

I like to shop alone, eat lunch alone, watch movies alone. There is a small list of people whose company I really enjoy, but that's a sometimes thing. Does anybody else like to do things by themselves? Am I a total crabass or something? I don't mean to be.

I AM looking forward to the Poetry Brothel next weekend because the people there will be awesome and many of us come not as real people but as alter egos, personae. I love this shit. I wish I had an actual MASK or something.

The new manuscript is getting all cross-genre, flash-fiction and whatnot. I'm totally excited about this. I want to write noir-ish crime stories and drink bourbon from a flask. I want to wear a fedora at my desk. I want a black cat named Ghost and a mysterious neighbor that will involve me in some kind of dramatic intrigue.

Things that just don't interest me but seem to fascinate everyone else:

Popular Television
Breast Augmentation
Other People's Romances
Being Wealthy
Other People's Vacations
Strangers with Babies
Date Movies

(It's totally cool that most people like things from the aforementioned list. This is not, by any means, a criticism. Just an observation.)

Things that do interest me that nobody wants to talk about:

Exotic Teas and Spices
Foreign Horror Films
Words People Never Use in Conversation, But Should
The Evolution of Chuck Norris as a Popular Internet Trope


Sara said...

I like to do things alone. A lot. You're not weird. Or at least you're not weird for a poet.

The brothel should totally have a masquerade ball! Wouldn't that me amazing?!

P.S. Word verification thinks you're "hotta"

Kathleen said...

I always have to look up the word "sidereal" and have never used it conversation but would like to hear it used!

I do lots of stuff alone. You are not a crabass. Or...I am one, too.

Susan said...

Sara, I shall happily settle for "not weird for a poet."

And Oh! How I would LOVE a masquerade ball, so long as the red death does not make an appearance :)


Kathleen, I like that word too! Also: consternation, vim, axiom, monolith... I may need to start a list!

I think it's quite pleasant to do things alone. I've had way too many people tell me they cannot do this, but need company for various activities and I was thinking of how draining it would be to try and dig up someone to accompany me for all kinds of everyday outings... I wouldn't like it.

Kathleen said...

I go to movies alone.

Hey, put on your corset. You get a Stylish Blogger award in my blog.

janelle elyse kihlstrom said...

I just read this, and I too relate so well. Maybe it is a poet thing, but you are not alone (so to speak ;) Ordinary, everyday solitude is definitely underrated.

Hannah said...

It's so strange, I was feeling a lot of pressure from the outside world recently to be more 'fun'. But for me, 'fun' is playing sudoku and listening to an audiobook, painting splodgey paintings and assigning miscellaneous meanings to them and baths. All of these things, I do alone. That to me is fun.
And stumbling upon your post makes me feel better because fun is relative both culturally and personally. Everyone's different. Sometimes being a bit of a, dare I say it, introvert might make one feel ostricised?
You sound like loads of fun to me anyway. Mmm...cake and Nirvana

Gaylle said...

oh... please DO talk about mythology LOL

Darren said...

I can relate to this post as a felloow loner. There may be more to it than being a poet. Here's an article I have a pathological need to share with other people who talk about the joys of being alone.
Caring for your Introvert: